/blood orange

When you close your eyes at night, what is the state of your mind? Do you go to sleep knowing you’ve done what you wanted to do today or do you plan on sleepwalking to get those steps in? Or is there no difference between the waking hours and these, because you are always half-asleep, doing things you automatically think you have to do?

They say, “Don’t go to sleep one night. What you most want will come to you then.” Do you have such nights? Does it really come to you? Or do the flashing lights of doom-scrolling dry your eyes and you are forced to sleep? Are you your usual overanalytical self or are you just a kid that needs help? Are you a person or are you merely an echo of who you are?

Do you feel like you’re ascending, inching closer to where you want to be and that satisfaction leads to sleep? Or do you feel like you’re flying in a vacuum, flapping your wings tirelessly only to find yourself in the same spot? Do you wish you were somebody else? Do you feel is this all that there is?

Or are you human, afraid to admit it, and all of these depending on the day?
Do you also put on a brave face, pretend that it’s all right, Repaint your mind blood orange, so you can sleep through the night.

Or is it just me?